3rd Week

This week was a little interesting because I actually made a mistake, and I felt terrible about it. During the summer, the security guard told me to never allow homeless people to use the clinic's restrooms. If we let one person in, there's a good chance that they will let their friends know that the clinic let them use the restrooms and water fountains and many of them may camp out in the restrooms. However, I never really was forced to turn anyone away because the security guard was always at the front desk, and she usually handled it. But this week, while the security guard was at lunch, I was sitting at the front desk by myself. A middle-aged man came in and asked to use the restrooms. Without thinking I said, "sure, the restrooms are to your right." It never even occurred to me that this man was homeless! Eventually, the security guard came back and the man came out of the restroom. The man then turned to me and said, "thank you so much ma'm. Thank you very very much." I smiled and said good-bye. Once this happened, the security guard asked me what that man wanted, and I replied that he wanted to use the restrooms. The security guard gave me a look, and it was then that I realized my mistake. The security immediately told me that remember not to let homeless people in and I sort of received a lecture. I immediately apologized and explained that it's very hard for me to turn people away when all they want to do is use the restroom. The security guard wasn't angry and she understands that it's hard to play the bad guy, but it's something that has to be done when working in the area that San Jose Clinic is located.

This experience reinforced that I honestly need to stop being so shy. I know I'm a pushover and I'm too nice. I hate disappointing people or having people dislike me so I try to go out of my way just to please them. But in reality, this isn't always going to work. I know that I will have to be that bad guy and sometimes I'm just going to have to be plain mean. It's not something anyone wants to do, but I know there are times where it will benefit more people in the long run.